(The weight I gained during COVID-19 caused me to lose my cheekbones). But beautiful? Purely subjective, I'm thinking.

Have you noticed that DU-ers rarely post personal pics anymore? One gets enough trolling PM's from the filth at Conservative Cave, and one retreats behind anonymity again.

I learned way too late in my career not to end a patient visit with the too-general “Any questions?” and thereby open Pandora’s box. I modified that to, “Any questions about what we talked about today?”

And, if, when I’d have my hand on the doorknob preparing to exit the exam room, I’d hear that phrase we all dread, “By the way, as long as I’m here…”, unless the BTW was truly urgent, I found people/parents were generally accepting of me saying, “That sounds like something that deserves it’s own appointment so we can give it the time it deserves.” No one likes hearing, “I’m sorry, I don’t have time,” even if it’s true.

I once had a young man, 18 or so, make an appointment for a cold. As I had my hand on the doorknob, he said, “By the way, I’ve been having chest pain when I run.” I wanted to ask him why he hadn’t made the appointment for that! WTF!

…a parent making an appt for one child and then wanting to have one or more siblings looked at, too, saying, “It’ll only take a second.”

Nothing only takes a second. I would accommodate those requests when I could, with the proviso that if I found something that needed to be treated, a full patient encounter would have to be opened.

I don’t think parents try this at the dentist, make an appointment for one child to have their teeth cleaned and then ask the hygienist to squeeze in an additional kid or two.

Some Octomom brings in all of her wall-crawlers, and makes only one appointment for them, then says: "Oh, just get them all done at once!"

That's one I haven't heard before, and it's very descriptive! Made me think of a swarm of small spiders, which fits well with "octomom," as spiders have 8 legs!

I entered an exam room for a well-child check, and there were no fewer than three kids in the room, a couple of them literally climbing up the walls (lots of medical equipment containers to hang on to; who cares if they get tipped over or damaged?), and one was trying on the exam gloves; there was a small pile of discarded ones at his feet already.

The mother just sat there, in blissful ignorance; no disciplining, no "get down from there!", no nothing.

I almost turned around and went back out; it was my first year in practice; if it happened today, I definitely would have.

I only had one kid, and she was a handful; was diagnosed with ADHD in the 3rd grade, and it was definitely the hyperactive variety. She. Could. Not. Sit. Still. for any amount of time when she was small, unless she was engaged with something or someone. She HAD to have something to play with or an activity of some kind, or else she would be trying to get into and/or climb on anything in sight.

Any time my husband and I were out with her, we were always either trying to keep her amused, chasing after her, or both, and if she managed to get into something before we could catch up with her (little kids can move incredibly fast), we were always absolutely mortified. This was long before the days of smart phones and tablets, so we didn't even have "screen time" as an option. It was...challenging.

It absolutely blows my mind that there are parents who will capmly sit by and let their kids run completely wild, the way you described. I know they exist; I've seen this phenomenon myself, but I am baffled by it. I don't understand what could be going through that woman's mind that she would think any of that was okay.

People like her give all parents a bad name and are the topic of many rants in forums for "child free" folks.

I'm sure it is well deserved based on your many posts on DU about things you've done for patients, etc.

Be proud of yourself. We all need a little uplift once in a while. You are appreciated.

I know you have a soft, beautiful, caring face....

Can be seen on the outside, regardless of superficial pulchritude.

Well, now you know.

Last edited Tue Jul 15, 2025, 04:44 PM - Edit history (1)

I am sure ALL you medical professionals do the best you possibly can under the worst of circumstances. I greatly admire and respect all of you docs, PA’s, and nurses here on DU. Yay!

That said, I am reminded of my own situation many years ago.

I had 3 kids under the age of 6 and was a stay-at-home mom. Despite what JD Vance thinks, not all of us had grandparents, aunts, uncles, or other extended family living nearby who were able and willing to babysit the siblings when one of them had a doctor’s appointment. I certainly had no family help whatsoever and it didn’t know anyone I trusted to stay with my kids “on call” since I moved to a new area when first one was born. I knew nobody. So, if I wanted to go anywhere, doctor, grocery store, drugstore, etc. I had to take all 3 of them with me or wait til my husband got home which was too late for most medical offices. Our pediatrician was wonderful with extra kids along, she and her staff were used to it, providing toys and books in each exam room to entertain the siblings. All three of them left her office with a Popsicle every time.

Thank God my gynecologist had Saturday hours, although one time I had to see her for an urgent problem and it was a weekday and I had just my first son at the time, he was 3 and 1/2. I just figured I’d have to chain him to a chair in the waiting room or something. I brought some of his favorite toys along.

The two office workers were so nice about it when I asked them sheepishly if someone could please keep an eye on him in the waiting room. The one woman let him come back into the office and bang on an old typewriter and the other one gave him a set of plastic dinosaurs and by the time I got out of the exam room he was so occupied he didn’t realize I was all done and he didn’t want to go home!

Another thought that came to my mind was that maybe a mom trying to have a doctor look at all her kids at once might not have insurance and might not have the money for separate appointments. Maybe she has to take time off from her job and doesn’t have any PTO. For sure it inconveniences the doc and staff and takes time away from other patients. But some moms don’t know what else to do so they try this. I blame our society for some of these things. It isn’t easy. America does not make being a mom of small children very easy. So, that is all I wanted to say. Love you all.

I wanted amoxicillin for an infection on my leg caused by a dog scratch.

I said I’m very concerned about a spot on my arm that recently turned darker - can you look at it.

She says NO - make another appointment for that

So I have to wait for another apt and she thinks it’s melanoma and schedules me for dermatology. It was melanoma.

It would have taken her 5 seconds to look at it.

No matter how rushed I am. Benign skin conditions can be very difficult to distinguish from each other sometimes. But malignant lesions usually have a very distinctive presentation, which makes them easy to diagnose.

The kind of "Oh, one more thing!" I usually get, though, is more like this:

"Oh! One more thing! My elbow pops when I extend my arm."

"Does it hurt?"

"No."

"How long has this been going on?"

"Oh...about ten years."

"I think it can wait for your next visit, then."

Prioritizing is an important part of the job.

I got one from a medical person too

when I woke up from anesthesia following sinus surgery I was chatting with nurses - they knew I worked 12 hour night shifts and asked if I was a nurse....I told them no, I think that would be too hard, I work in IT.......a grizzled older nurse leaned down to me and whispered, "It's easy with patients like you."

you know you're getting mad respect.

but there are complements, and then there are character-defining compliments - that's what we got!