and I hadn't even had any weed when I watched it

I laughed out loud

this afternoon when I saw this and I wasn't even stoned then

Officer: “Why is a pizza box a large square when the pizza is round and cut into tiny triangles?”
Suspect: “Whoa!”

Thanks for this one

Eight of us were in a van parked in the lot of a restaurant we were celebrating one New Year's Eve

When the cops signaled us to step out, they literally JUMPED back when a cloud of smoke billowed out

All but my GF then HIGH-tailed it back into the restaurant, while I was left to talk my way out of it

Fortunately, they must have been in a good mood that night, in that Southern California beach town,
and just let me off with a "keep the celebrations in the restaurant," and I wisely didn't point out that
we couldn't toke-out inside lol

I realize I should've been quite nervous and concerned.

But I was truly quite stoned, and everything was happening so fast.

I certainly got very lucky that night to get the right pair of officers, who I think were more concerned with suppressing their mirth at the situation, and looking forward to story having funny story to share back at the station. It was still early in the evening, well before the midnight hour, and I think maybe they had better things to do than process my case ?

Probably also helped that this was a few years before Nancy Reagan's Just Say No campaign !

Our party stopped for lunch at a beautiful clearing at the side of the river.

Standing there, I was taking in the gorgeous scenery.

I had a lit joint in my left hand. I was enjoying it.

Suddendly, there's a voice in my right ear. A park ranger with gun and badge is standing next to me on my right side. He's one foot away.

He's asking for my opinion of the river today, like the current speed and the weather. Am I enjoying the park?

I was never more pot-paranoid in my life!

A friend saw what was happening and distracted the ranger.

I put that thing out so fast!

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