best to get as much info as you can. What a way to start the new year, huh?

Shit is getting. I feel like I'm in quicksand.

I hope you get the information you need to know what to do to regain your health balance.
It's so scary when there's that cascade of trouble. We (my significant other, not me) had that this past year. Three surgeries-- three completely unrelated issues. And now another one has come up.
I never thought I'd be the healthier one.

Hang in there. The CT scan is a good first step, and a team you can trust.

I want imaging and a consult with an MD. that's all. Maybe what's happening is annoying but not serious. Unfortunately, I need the referral from the dentist who injured me. I feel trapped in a loop of crazy. I thought I could pay out of pocket and get one. But its referral only. And the dentist is the referrer. Going to finish the dental work and then ask for a referral. Also considering just forgetting about it. If its serious then just let it take its course.

That's a good reason to keep investigating.
But I'm with you. I'm not good at ignoring pain, but I'm good at ignoring "red flags" that don't hurt.

I have under jaw pain and headaches. My ears hurt. I cannot get in to see a specialist

Sometimes dental work can trigger that. I have gotten it a couple times after dental work. It can be excruciating. I hope it's just that, because it's fixable. But I'm sure you thought of that already!

Early august. Symptoms developing over months. Now my lower jaw muscles hurt. I'm terrified and cannot get help.

Have you tried a few days of prescription-dose ibuprofen? That's about 1600-2000 mg a day (4-5 doses a day). Could be worth the experiment. It will reduce the inflammation and (if it's TMJ) allow the jaw to settle.
The ear pain was the symptom you mentioned that caught my attention, as that's what I had. I was sure I had some terrible ear infection, but it was the jaw pain radiating to the ear.

I hope you find some relief! I've had this about 10 times in 20 years, and it's always excruciating.

They don't show nerves though. Afraid and worried.