General Discussion

REPEATEDLY as a toddler, (went on for at least a year and some change, 5 days a week), I'll always have that deadly wound in my soul. Until recently, I thought that I had somehow escaped the damage that brings because I have never abused drugs, alcohol, worked in the sex industry, had mental illness, etc ad nauseum, I was the rare lucky survivor. However, I have had SERIOUS health issues ALL MY LIFE including a duodenal ulcer I never knew I had, (until it perforated which resulted in COMPLETELY bleeding out 2x and being clinically dead for 45 minutes), I somehow survived a terminal diagnosis of metastatic cervical cancer, I have a crazy immune system that I'm trying to survive, (Diffuse Sarcoidosis that has morphed into Cardiac Sarcoidosis, Neurosarcoid, pulmonary sarcoid...it's EVERYWHERE!), onset of complex bilateral temporal epilepsy...I don't think that everything I've undergone healthwise is disconnected to what happened to me as a child. Add to that the physical beatings I suffered at the hands of my "father" & I should be shocked to even be alive.