General Discussion

I've been close to cancer deaths and I know how hard it is on a family.

Hold your brother close to you as you have apparently done. In my experience it is always the spouse who suffers the most. It was certainly the case for my father when my mother died. As I was close to him, I had to fight off other people who wanted to criticize how he dealt with his grief.

The sense of grief can and sometimes does peak well after the funeral. The grief never goes away really but what happens is one learns to live with it.

I think my most selfish wish is to die before my wife. I'm pretty sure I wouldn't be strong enough to deal with losing her, but I know she's stronger than I could ever hope to be and could go on without me.