Bedtime For Bongo [View all]

Dan Bongino goes ashen-faced, gets sidelined.

We were wondering when Deputy FBI Director/ kook Daniel John Bongino was going to resurface in the news. Now he has, because he’s getting pushed out of his job! Attorney General Pam Bondi and FBI Director Kash Patel have appointed an unprecedented CO-deputy to do the deputy FBI directing “with” him, Missouri Attorney General Andrew Bailey.

The Trump administration has decided it will never fire anyone, because it does not want to give the media a “scalp.” So instead the regime sidelines internal naysayers and incompetent fuckups until they can get re-education, like Tulsi Gabbard, and/or buttresses them with a minder to do the actual job so they only have to puppet, see Sec Def Pete Hegseth and General Dean “Razin” Caine. And now it’s a Bingo-bango-bongo babysitter!

Bongino’s been on a nearly month-long meltdown, reportedly over his total humiliation in front of all of his slackjawed fans, re: The Epstein Files. Pivoting to RUSSIA RUSSIA RUSSIA files and “Epstein DID kill himself” is apparently not that easy!

And of all the unqualified conspiracy-theorist loons that President Donald J. Trump has appointed, Bongino may be frontrunner for the dumbest. He makes Matthew Meatball McPeenertoilet Whitaker look like a Rhodes scholar. He is but a simple lunkhead, and his talent is grunting angrily into a microphone while veins throb on his temples. Epstein conspiracies were among his favorites as a grifting pundit and podcaster, along with ranting that libs were PUSSIES and he was OWNING them, and the usual InfoWars conspiracy theories about PLANDEMIC HUNTER BIDEN LAPTOP RUSSIA HOAX and CORRUPT FBI.

But there’s no unskilled labor. Yammering in a soundproofed closet about LIBRUL PUSSIES is one thing, but being able to promote multiple conspiracy theories that contradict each other and are a 180-degree pivot from a theory you were just brashly proclaiming as true facts two minutes ago, while people try to ask you questions, well, could you do it?

https://www.wonkette.com/p/bedtime-for-bongo

Bongo just pawn in game of life (from the comments...)