Rena - without closure. She was with us for only 2 1/2 years. She's gone and I still think about her. [View all]

A bit about the circumstances. Our old house has 14 rooms and when we were younger, it served a a kind of 60''s 70's commune. We joined two families together, along with 4 kids. Sometimes, friends of the kids would come and stay for a day or two or even a few months until something better would come up. The house was crowded when friends came to stay but it was fun. I miss those days, having supper at our large table. Sometimes up to 15 people over for supper and a separate table would be brought out and set up.

Time passed, the kids are out. Then Lynn got sick - beginning of dementia. This required a live-in aid. So, in came Rena. I guess she was in her 70's and Lynn was going to be her last client after which she was going to go back to Jamaica where she grew up and owned property.

After Lynn would get settled in for the night, Rena would come down and we would have supper and talk about our childhood, our history and so forth. I learned that she was a sergeant in the Jamaican army. Her father was dead and her mother lived in Brooklyn. We are in N.J. and she also had an apartment in East Orange to which she would go when the agency sent relief care givers. Or she would go to stay with her mother in Brooklyn for a day or so.

In particular, most Sunday mornings when I am cooking bacon and eggs or such, she comes to mind. We would sometimes cook together and she would chide me about "You're leave all that goodness in the pan." Her cooking was clearly better than mine.

After 2 1/2 years, Lynn declined to the point that Rena could no longer care for her. It was time to go to a memory care facility. The place we chose that we could afford was about an hour's drive. We would visit Lynn at least once a week and Rena would sometimes join us.

Then along with all of this, came COVID. We all get vaccinated. Rena did not. She did not trust it

In the middle of all of this, she said she was going to stay at her mother's house for a few days because her aunt was ill.

That was the last we heard from or of her. I checked the apartment building security staff in East Orange where she lived. They knew nothing and had not heard from her in weeks. The apartment was eventually vacated by the process of eviction for nonpayment of rent. The agency cannot or will not disclose any information about her.

I think about her from time to time and wish I had closure of knowing what happened, even though the answer is probably obvious.

3H