Cops were called Tuesday afternoon to the Food Lion after employees reported that “an older white male” stole $75 worth of ribeye steaks. The workers said that the man drove away from the Roebuck store in a green Nissan (the license plate for which they copied down).

Spartanburg County Sheriff’s Office deputies traced the car back to David Samuel Hoyt, 55, who they found at the residence of Angela Woody, who “lives on Shaw Rd. down from the Church of God.”

During questioning, Hoyt (seen above) initially denied stealing the steaks, but later “made a verbal confession” to the theft, saying that he put the meat in bags and walked out of Food Lion.

Woody, Hoyt’s 47-year-old girlfriend, offered a police lieutenant further details about her beau’s steak heist. “Mrs. Woody confirmed that Mr. Hoyt had taken meat from Food Lion by putting it in his colostomy bag,” a deputy noted.