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let them flow over you. let your grief sink in.
it is fighting these things that causes the stress. your life is not what you want. your family is not what you want. you have gaping holes in the life you want to lead. you are allowed to grieve for that. you have to grieve for that.
you can't make it go around you, you can only let it go through you.
and don't apologize. this place is here to vent.
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