Seniors

pat_k

(11,700 posts)

43. Lightening is great if it is for you.

Sun Sep 7, 2025, 12:29 AM

Sunday

If not motivated to on your own behalf, leave things be.

Since my mother's death, my step-father has been kicking himself for not doing enough to clear out "so you don't have to."

If he wants to lighten up for himself, great. But I would so much prefer he relax and step pressuring himself. He refuses help, so I just end up feeling crappy that he is seemingly torturing himself "on my account." I try to explain that witnessing how hard he is being on himself is causing me far more pain in the present than anything I would need to deal with as executer.

Something more is going on and I'm at a bit of a loss.

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