Bereavement
In reply to the discussion: My Mother's dead. I don't know what to do. I'll never be able to hug [View all]Collimator
(1,947 posts)As others have pointed out, losing the woman who gave you life is one of the most difficult challenges that you will face. Grief is a journey and everyone's experience is unique to a degree--sort of like our mothers.
It has been 13 years since I lost my complicated, troubled mother and I am still working out my feelings about her. But I know that there is much to cherish and there are still a few small services that I can render to her. I try to offer emotional support to my brother who still feels her loss and I share her legacy of cancer survival with young parents. I savor the scent of lilacs because she loved their fragrance and I smile with the memory of bringing her handfuls of blossoms pinched from our neighbor's bush.
Sometime, far in the future, you will find your grief transmuting into little gems of memory, but for now, it just plain hurts. I hope that you are finding the practical and emotional support that you need in this time. You will find your way through this.
You don't have to be strong every minute of the day. Give over to your weakness when you need to. Just don't give in to it entirely. That is not what your mother would want for you.
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