Welcome to DU! The truly grassroots left-of-center political community where regular people, not algorithms, drive the discussions and set the standards. Join the community: Create a free account Support DU (and get rid of ads!): Become a Star Member Latest Breaking News Editorials & Other Articles General Discussion The DU Lounge All Forums Issue Forums Culture Forums Alliance Forums Region Forums Support Forums Help & Search

Moostache

(10,727 posts)
47. I am happy that you remain mentally fit and hale enough to share that with us...
Wed Jul 30, 2025, 02:11 PM
Jul 30

My own father is 83 now and suffering from progressive dementia and the effects that has after his own litany of woe that makes my head hurt still. Since the pandemic, my father has lost his wife (my mother) to COVID-19, his mobility and self-reliance (to a stroke and subsequent long-term effects), his continence (to bladder cancer), his ability to travel and move about freely (to a fall and broken hip) and his memory is slowly fading as well. He spent a lifetime raising my brother, my sister and I to be emphathetic people, to care more about fairness and justice than "getting one over" on someone. He modeled what it meant to be a husband for me to follow (after a 52 year marriage to my mother, that while not without its fair share of challenges), and is STILL my north star and one that I hope I am half as successful modelling for my children. I can't face myself some days when I fail to visit him because of the stress it creates for me.

My personal weakness is magnified by events like when he failed to recognize me for the first time ever a couple weeks back. That rocked my world as much as anything since we lost Mom in November of 2020, just days after the election.

It has felt (personally) like a non-stop demolition derby ever since that. Despite the accomplishments and efforts of the Biden administration, nothing ever really seemed to make Trump go the fuck away. He was a candidate from the day after the 2020 election and the fact that he was not held to account by the Senate for January 6th was the death knell of the first American Republic in my mind. Everything since last November has been just bad news on top of bad news on toip of worse news. I don't know what to do about it. I have had a lifetime of watching mass protests (from the antiwar efforts in 1990 and again in 2002, to the anti-gun violemence marches and the #Me Too movement to the BLM movement and George Floyd) time and time and time again get some temporary attention only to fade into the next sensational news "story" of the moment.

We have devolved into an unserious nation of toddlers screaming at their parents that they don't want to go to bed, they don't want to eat their vegetables, they don't want to study, they don't want to care about others' feelings. It is hurtful to watch and live, but its crushing to see it sap the will of those who have spent far longer than I trying to make it a little better.

I lack the answers or even a good idea of what to do to save this nation from splitting into a second American republic and a second American confederacy, but I don't see it ever happening peacefully or without massive human tolls being extracted. It hurts my soul to see MineralMan express the kind of frustration and sense of forboding or loss that I am going through because for years here at DU I have read his posts and material with great admiration and interest. He has modelled much of what I value and respect and to see him hurting is soul crushing all over again.

I wish there was a path ahead that did not appear to be doom and gloom. I truly do. I just do not see it - on a personal level, on a local level, on a national level and on an international level, humanity is surfing a wave of stupidity, immaturity and greed than is swamping everything of real value on this Earth. It is threatening to leave a smoldering cinder or a greenhouse amok hellscape or a Mad Maxian dystopia of highway mauraders and anarchy.

What just kills me is that there WERE BETTER OPTIONS ALL ALONG. People have been lied to, misled, used and soon will be discarded for the advantage of a select few and the benefit of a puny minority and their undeserving progeny.

MM...if it is any consolation, your work here and the things you have shared have been a candle in the dark for me for ages now and I truly hope we get to a happier place before your final farewells are given. Godspeed good sir and best wishes for health and happier memories with loved ones, family and friends.

Recommendations

8 members have recommended this reply (displayed in chronological order):

MLK said, "The arc of the moral universe is long but it bends toward justice." Ocelot II Jul 30 #1
I agree. We should be farther along that arc. MineralMan Jul 30 #2
I have always loved that quote (in my opinion one of the best, and most poignant, ever) stopdiggin Jul 30 #8
I had a patient who was a quadrapalegic Hornedfrog2000 Jul 31 #83
LOL popsdenver Jul 30 #57
I don't understand your LOL -- this is not a laughing matter Hekate Jul 31 #89
NOPE popsdenver Jul 31 #91
That quote from MLK never made any sense before and it doesn't now NoRethugFriends Jul 30 #76
This message was self-deleted by its author Mblaze Jul 30 #3
I turned 80 in Dec 2024 AverageOldGuy Jul 30 #4
We worked very hard Mblaze Jul 30 #5
I'm 75 and when I was 11 years old multigraincracker Jul 30 #6
I chose childfree I_UndergroundPanther Aug 1 #93
... emulatorloo Jul 30 #7
sorry you are feeling tired and down Kali Jul 30 #9
I turned 79 this summer. Biophilic Jul 30 #10
dear mm. ever since the devistatimg kerry and edwards losss , i have been at a loss. AllaN01Bear Jul 30 #11
I am feeling much the same way PatSeg Jul 30 #12
right there with you.... markie Jul 30 #13
Yes, we carry on. MineralMan Jul 30 #14
I was actually thinking this morning... Trueblue Texan Jul 30 #30
I was born in 1949. Scruffy1 Jul 30 #15
Yes. That's what I have done since 1960. MineralMan Jul 30 #16
Freedom Is a Constant Struggle struggle4progress Jul 30 #80
I'm 81. Your life and mine have a lot of parallels. "Old age ain't for sissies" Bette Davis Ping Tung Jul 30 #17
Big K&R for a Big DU Contributor Martin Eden Jul 30 #18
Thanks for sharing your hard earned wisdom and perspective! A bit younger, but I shared your disappointment. I have wiggs Jul 30 #19
Post removed Post removed Jul 30 #20
Uh. no, thanks! MineralMan Jul 30 #21
Enjoy your short stay at DU calguy Jul 30 #22
I have a feeling you may be a bit too liberal for this website BWdem4life Jul 30 #23
You're a real jerk, aren't you Grim Chieftain Jul 30 #24
It sure looks like it wendyb-NC Jul 30 #25
Happy Birthday 😀 malaise Jul 30 #26
Corporate power and capitalism will not allow the kind of progress we yearn for. BWdem4life Jul 30 #27
When I was in high school, if a girl got pregnant out of wedlock she had two choices. totodeinhere Jul 30 #28
Seeing the same stuff... Trueblue Texan Jul 30 #29
On the subject of children and grandchildren popsdenver Jul 30 #58
Happy birthday . . . I think. I'm 4 years behind you, but your post feels like going back in the time machine. Vinca Jul 30 #31
Thanks for the reply! MineralMan Jul 30 #33
Thank you for your heart felt post MineralMan. 1WorldHope Jul 30 #32
You have done more than most. At some point, our role becomes to advise the younger LoisB Jul 30 #34
Happy Birthday Mineral Man lostincalifornia Jul 30 #35
Not as happy as I might have liked, I'm afraid. MineralMan Jul 30 #36
Thanks for the great history, MM! I've been reading you... keep_left Jul 30 #37
Thanks for your thoughtful reply. MineralMan Jul 30 #39
A belated happy birthday, MineralMan - and I hope your birthday yesterday had some real joy, that highplainsdem Jul 30 #38
Right there with you. I grew up in the BA, home to the hippies, LGBTQ, alternative lifestyles. 58Sunliner Jul 30 #40
Don't feel badly, MM. OldBaldy1701E Jul 30 #41
Right there with you Figarosmom Jul 30 #42
I feel your pain. riverbendviewgal Jul 30 #43
I have a quotation for you nuxvomica Jul 30 #44
Congrats on a good life - so far. SleeplessinSoCal Jul 30 #45
Soon to be 86 and I have those same feelings! young_at_heart Jul 30 #46
I am happy that you remain mentally fit and hale enough to share that with us... Moostache Jul 30 #47
These are difficult times. No question about it. MineralMan Jul 30 #50
Thank you for all of your service! Tbear Jul 30 #48
Excellent post MM. It really is a cruel and unraveling Evolve Dammit Jul 30 #49
Truly, we live in interesting times. MineralMan Jul 30 #51
Ironically, it feels like what my Dad and other family members fought against since the civil war. Evolve Dammit Jul 30 #53
I think it is always the same fight. Always has been. MineralMan Jul 30 #55
MM and other Boomers at DU JustAnotherGen Jul 30 #52
Honestly, we were opening doors for ourselves, mostly. MineralMan Jul 30 #54
Until 2023 JustAnotherGen Jul 30 #59
You and I have been on similar paths our whole lives. One key difference: we did have one child. usaf-vet Jul 30 #56
You've done very well, I'd say. MineralMan Jul 30 #60
Yes. I wrote DU last week about having the same depressing review, see link Dock_Yard Jul 30 #61
Thanks for this! madamesilverspurs Jul 30 #62
I am also 80. Codifer Jul 30 #63
My father was a B-17 co-pilot in England, WWII, fighting a nazi dictator Number9Dream Jul 30 #64
Dear MM, sinkingfeeling Jul 30 #65
My best wishes to you. MineralMan Jul 30 #73
All too relatable, minus the escape to Costa Rica Hekate Jul 30 #75
I'm right there with you. Katinfl Jul 30 #66
Throughout history social progress has ebbed & flowed. It's never been a simple linear progression. CaptainTruth Jul 30 #67
The end of my story remains as yet unwritten DFW Jul 30 #68
That is jaw-droppingly gorgeous. Thx so much for this production & post. ❤️ Hekate Jul 30 #77
I had imagined in my head MANY years ago DFW Jul 30 #79
The Parody Project put it out on their channel as sort of a breather from politics. DFW Jul 31 #84
Dear MineralMan, if I may JMCKUSICK Jul 30 #69
May it be so. MineralMan Jul 30 #74
You accomplished much. creeksneakers2 Jul 30 #70
Nothing Is Wasted. / You speak for me, MM. Your life has been so much more adventurous than mine ... Hekate Jul 30 #71
When the Ship Comes In struggle4progress Jul 30 #72
This is one of the most amazing posts.. Permanut Jul 30 #78
This message was self-deleted by its author pat_k Jul 30 #81
Thank You. You've had a great Life. BurnDoubt Jul 30 #82
To Everyone Who Visited This Thread: Thank you so much! MineralMan Jul 31 #85
And what changed during your 80 and my 78 years? Septua Jul 31 #86
This Hekate Jul 31 #88
You may be disappointed, but don't be discouraged vanessa_ca Jul 31 #87
I'm 76 and feel I have a job to do to meet these times The Blue Flower Jul 31 #90
It's a dark place in our history for certain Septua Jul 31 #92
Latest Discussions»General Discussion»80 Years of Trying Is Cir...»Reply #47